In the house, voices arc, unnatural lightning. Outside, the dog on point, nose to the screen door; the child holds her breath, counting.
Gorgeous. You can see the entire scene and feel the various emotions.
Love the double entendre of arc!
And the child’s counting. Wonder what second spacer she’s using: Mississippi, cotton candy, one thousand, bunny ears…?
You can almost feel the tension this story portrays; an excellent example of showing instead of telling.
Wow. This made me catch my breath for that little girl. I love it!